Future/Life Planning!

Aaaahh!

So.. I officially have past the 10 week countdown until school is OVER FOREVER!! (excluding exams)
And I have realised.. shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit. I NEED to decide what I am doing with my life!! Last week, as those of you who are subscribed to my YouTube channel will know, I was in London and saw Wicked for the first time! It was absolutely breathtaking and I utterly adored it. It did make me cry.. and not when you'd expect.

I was enjoying the show, as you do, then: BAM. I was in floods of tears? In that moment, my heart leapt up and was doing everything in its power to tell me that all I ever want in life is to perform.. preferably on a West End stage but just performing in general.
I've known I've wanted this for years, but lately I've been telling myself that I don't desperately want it, nor will it ever happen; but after this teeny tiny breakdown at one of the happiest parts of the show, I can't deny it anymore.

But..

I'm shit scared.
I have a pathetic amount of experience for a start. I have only done theatre for about two or three years, and because of a medical condition when I was younger, I was unable to take dance, and to this day I still, technically, shouldn't do ballet and some other styles. I don't think I can sing.. at least not to an amazing standard which could compensate for my lack of dance skills and acting.. well I honestly don't know anything about my acting skills.
Whilst, originally, I wanted to go to Arts Educational, I for no way can afford £13,000 a year! FOR THREE YEARS! and moving to London! So I've set my sights to somewhere closer to home. The MGA Academy in Edinburgh. It still costs but it's so much more affordable and I already know it from using their studios with my previous theatre group.
In all honesty, I'm mostly concerned about the audition process; which for MGA, I actually don't know what this is, but I hate the idea of auditions where you have to choreograph your own dance and perform it with all the other auditionees watching. I'd much prefer a dance workshop where they teach you a dance and you perform in groups of 4 or so.. In my opinion that's a better way to do it, as you can judge how fast people pick up a dance, how they work with you and your teaching and not everybody is a dancer, so in a way it's perhaps fairer for them.. I don't particularly have experience with doing singing and acting/monologue auditions but I think (hope) I can cope with those... so I suppose I'm mostly worried about dancing..

This post has basically turned into more of a diary/rant but it's made me feel better and who knows, maybe it will help somebody else? I don't even know haha anyway!

See ya later!
~Emma x

Hey hey you! click me! (London trip video)

Little Life Update

Hey guys!

I've been extremely busy the past week with Preliminary Examinations at school which has meant I haven't had much time at all to film a video to upload tomorrow!

I did have a "How To Celebrate Valentines Day Alone" video planned but unfortunately, as aforementioned, I didn't have time to film. 

I considered filming it tonight and spending tomorrow editing and uploading but there were a few issues encountered when I tried to do this and also, tomorrow will be spent packing!

I'm going to London, just for the night with my friend Aaron on Wednesday-Thursday! I'll hopefully vlog whilst I'm there so you can look forward to that! We haven't actually got anything planned except going to the Leicester Square ticket hut and seeing a random show since we are both passionate about musical theatre and can't pick a show haha!

Hope you're all well!

~Emma xx

Blogging Failure!

Let's be honest, people..

I think I'm going to bail on my "one post a week" aim due to the fact that I am struggling to find the time to think of a good post along with writing it up, adding photos as well as filming/editing a video each week without including school and homework.

I have my Prelim exams starting this week so I'm currently super busy studying and I just feel that in order to make this blog worthwhile, I should just post when I have an idea or feel like updating you, rather than making a crappy, boring post every week?
Quality over quantity, as they say!

I don't intend to take months at a time between posts but maybe every couple of weeks rather than every week..
I still hope to upload to YouTube every Tuesday though.

See ya at some point!


~ Emma xx

This or That Beauty Tag!!

Hey guys! Todays post is going to be a fairly simple "This or That" tag, found here.
Please leave your answers below if you feel like it! :)

Makeup:
blush or bronzer - Blush
lip gloss or lipstick - Lipstick
eye liner or mascara - Mascara
foundation or concealer - Concealer
neutral or colour eye shadow - Neutral
pressed or loose eye shadows - Pressed
brushes or sponges -Brushes

Nails:
OPI or china glaze - OPI
 Long or short - Mid-length
Acrylic or natural - Natural
Brights or darks - Brights
Flower or no flower - I have no idea what this means, please enlighten me!

Body:
perfume or body splash - Either
lotion or body butter - Lotion
body wash or soap - Body wash
lush or other bath company - Lush

Fashion:
jeans or sweat pants - Sweatpants
long sleeve of short - Short
dresses or skirts - Dresses
stripes or plaid - Stripes
flip flops or sandals - Sandals
scarves or hats - Hats
studs or dangly earrings - Studs
necklaces or bracelets - Bracelets
heels or flats - Flats
cowboy boots or riding boots - COMBATS
jacket or hoodie - Hoodie
forever 21 or charlotte russe - Forever 21
abercombie or Hollister - Hollister
saks 5th or nordstrom - /

Hair:
curly or straight - Curly
bun or ponytail - Ponytail
bobby pins or butterfly clips - Bobby pins
hair spray or gel - Spray
long or short - Loooooooooooooong
light or dark - weeeeelllllll
side sweep bangs or full bangs - Side fringe
up or down - Down!!

Random:
Rain or shine - Rain
Summer or winter - Both!
Fall or spring - Autumn
Chocolate or vanilla - Vanilla
East coast or west coast - Yeah, I live in Scotland and have never left Europe.....

 

****

Sorry this weeks post was a fairly boring one! I've been super busy and barely had time to do anything so when I had spare time I made editing this weeks video my priority. Speaking of which, this weeks video can be found here: http://youtu.be/x7IZmYXYHtM

 

~Emma x

                                                            

Study, Study, Study!

Hi everyone!

School's been back for over a week now and Christmas officially feels over for another year!

We got our timetable this week for "prelims" (a mock exam which you use to see how well you are doing, predict the grade you will get in the final exam and also for any appeals in case you fail due to extreme reasons or can't sit the exam) and I have realised just how much work I really need to do!

I have found myself becoming very stressed out the past couple of weeks and I do believe that school has a part to play in that. I got that wound up I ended up rather unwell, and so today (Monday) I have had to give myself a "time out" from school and lie in bed. I was awake the whole night - no exaggeration. I have had no sleep and been awake for almost 24 hours. Not good. So I am exhausted. Currently, I'm laying in bed with a homemade hot cinnamon-chocolate (basically just a hot chocolate but with a spoonful of cinnamon too!) uploading a video and writing this post!

However, as grand as that may seem, I am going to do some school work as my "time out" is from the school building and environment, not my education!

I am so unorganised when it comes to studying! I can tell you that my prelims start the week after next and that I think I have on February 6th, but ask me what subject, room and time, I do not have a CLUE! If I can't even organise that, who knows how I organise my studying!

Truth is, I don't really study. I don't feel that looking over notes or rewriting them in different formats (bullet points, mind maps, flashcards etc.) help me - although they probably do. I feel that I get taught something in class, or write up notes I missed if I'm absent, and I just have to hope I remember it. There's nothing that feels right. You'd think after three years of exams I'd have found something.

nope

But it doesn't matter. It's honestly not worth the stress.

If you're like me, and you are worried about exams, studying and how this affects your future, I beg you; please don't panic. Whilst right now it may feel like these exams determine your future, I promise you, in the long run, it doesn't matter. So, a couple of employers may say "hmm you don't really have as high a qualification as this other candidate", if you show capability to do the job - or whatever it is - they will higher you. Chances are, like myself, your school will be a major factor as to why you are feeling this way. My school prides itself upon having one of the highest percentages of pupils going to university straight from school, and so they practically take the two senior years (5th and 6th) and try to force them into uni.

I for one, do not know what I am going to do come August, when summer is over and I don't have a career in mind. All I know is uni and college are not for me. Because of this, my own guidance teacher (you know? the teacher that you are meant to tell all your problems to, the teacher that is trained to deal with pupils respectfully and help them with basic problems such as deciding a career path all the way up to having learning/medical difficulties) basically said I am going to sit on the couch living off benefits in front of my whole class once. And be it as a joke or completely not meant that way, it wasn't something I appreciated. Just like the time I told her I wanted to do musical theatre and she brushed it off as a stupid idea by saying "my niece tried to do that and failed so if she can't do it then what's the point in you trying?"

 

Sorry, I'm going off track.

 

If we want to be honest with ourselves, just how good are current exams at determining our intelligence? Take higher English for example. There are two papers to sit:

Critical Essays

Close Reading

For me, in the critical essays paper, I need to answer a question on a poem I have studied and a question on a play. To pass, I need to have a good structure (introduction, organised paragraphs and a conclusion) have detailed analysis and most importantly: QUOTES

I'm sorry, but I need to memorise a bunch of quotes and analyse what they mean in an organised way to get an English qualification?

It's all a memory test.

Close Reading isn't much better

Read two passages, answer questions about imagery and word choices and describe how that makes you know what the writer thinks about a specific subject.

The only time I need to know how to do that is if I

A) want to become a journalist/author with decent writing ability

or B) an English teacher

 

I guess the point I am trying to make is that, while qualifications are important, they don't determine 99% of your life. Who you marry or become friends with isn't affected due to you passing your exams. and exams don't test your intelligence. They test your ability to memorise things and write it down in a certain amount of time when you are under pressure. So don't worry about them. Work hard and study if you want, but in 5-10 years time, will your qualifications mean anything?

Without including the fact you'll have life and job experience, if you look at me, the exams I sat in 2012 have already been abolished - nobody sits "standard grades" anymore.

 

Sorry for the long winded post. I think I've gone delusional/lost my mind from the lack of sleep!

 

See you next week!

~Emma xx

 

Ps. New video! Friend Challenge featuring http://rebeccasramblingrants.blogspot.co.uk/ 

http://youtu.be/iP6gzKSzkl8

Cosy Weekends and Dreadful Weekdays!

Hey Guys!

 

I'm going to apologise now for the lack of enthusiasm this post will contain and how short it will be. I'm currently feeling a little poopy. I sat down to write this post and the migraine train stopped off at station: ME.

 

yay.

 

I did plan a nice little update on my cosy weekend, consisting of me, laying in bed with Netflix - The only exception to this was Saturday night which consisted of me, laying on my friends couch with DVDs.. and far too much food for me to even think about (aka I feel like throwing up) haha.

We had an awesome night! I got her to watch Supernatural (Jensen Ackles eeeeeek!) and she got me nicely into The Vampire Diaries.

 

We watched two episodes and I am now sitting typing this post with only one other tab open; you guessed it, Netflix! and it is sitting waiting for me to press play on episode 6 :)

 

School has started back this week which, so far, has involved me skipping a class (Don't do this guys, education c'est trés imporante), heckling a senior member of staff in the corridor about me dropping a class (as in the one I skipped), being told "no", continuing to skip it and then going to my other classes and realising I reaaalllly need to revise for them since I have "pre-exams" coming up in like, literally two weeks!!!!



I hope you all are having fun at school or college or wherever you are and are feeling well! I'm off to lie in bed, watching vampire diaries and having an early night. Hopefully this little migraine of mine will disappear in the morning! I struggle to get up for school the best of days without being ill also!

 

See ya next week!

~Emma x

Ps. Mini Vlog & Haul from moi can be seen here :)  http://youtu.be/Lp64jOYi09s

Goodbye 2013!

Hola mis amigos!

It's officially the last day of 2013! We finally made it through this year!
For me, 2013 was definitely one roller coaster of a ride! It definitely had its ups (I mean, I actually met Justin Bieber!) but it definitely had its lows.

I'm not going to dwell on that which has passed as I believe we ought to keep positive! I'm a firm believer in happiness being a choice (thanks to Shay Carl of the Shaytards for enlightening me to this view). If we continue to look at those moments in life which were most definitely negative or impacted us in a negative way, and never try to view the positives in them, it will just bring us down. For example; in January 2013 I was very stressed out with school work and I gave in to it and left high school. I was then, by my mum, made to find some sort of job or January start college course. To cut the story short, I joined what I believed to be a course aimed towards musical theatre (a passion of mine). However, the course turned out nothing like that, I hated it and left after a month. For a long while I hated myself for leaving school and not getting by qualifications and then not even getting a certificate in the college course. I could look at this as a negative time in mylife, however, I did end up with a job for a while, more money than I ever had, and free time in which I found myself discovering my love for blogs and YouTube (zoella, sprinkle of glitter, stilababe09 to name but a few)

I decided to go back to school for my sixth and final year and picked up three of the same four "highers" (qualification) I was going the precious year along with Higher Philosphy.

School is great now! I don't hate it as much and I've only had two days absence! (From third year up until fifth I always had a very bad attendance. One year it was 22%...)

I still sometimes think about how if I had stuck in for another month or two of school I could've passed these exams already and be sitting Advanced highers in them. Alas, I cannot change the past, only the present and the future. The past year has shown me that I cannot allow these things to upset me. Yes, I can be seen as being a "step behind" but I view it as being a step forward. Everyone in my class is now about to go to college or university, and this may or may not be the right place for them. I already know this for myself and I am also more self-aware as to what is right for me and what I enjoy.

While I do not know what I intend to do next year - 7th year at school, a job - I do know that I really want to get right into my blog and my YouTube. I love sitting in front of the camera and talking to my  (so far not many, but wonderful!) subscribers and sharing things I have purchased and my favourite things etc. 

I also very much enjoy writing up my blog and spending time changing its design and layout to make it the kind of blog I, myself, would love to visit/read! I do it out of my love and passion for this area. Not because I think I'm the "next zoella" or anything. Wether I have 2 followers or 2 million followers, as long as somebody is enjoying the content I create I am happy. 

I guess I've went a little off topic!
For 2014 I have a few "new years resolutions". The first of these I've spoken about to you before; and that is uploading a video to my youtube channel once a week as well as writing a blog post once a week. I intend on making this the same day (a Tuesday) but the day for blog posts may change :)

I hope you all ring in 2014 full of joy and are looking forward to it! Let me know what your plans for the year are in the comments below or what positive experiences happened to you in 2013!

See you next year ;)

~Emma x

PS. this weeks video can be found here: http://youtu.be/gVUsuMSyUGU